The day you saw me
by Shen of Thunder
Summary: The day you saw me I wanted to die, even though I was dead I would live forever...(rateing may change suicide and a possible lemon)
1. intro

(Disclaimer)I do not own Inuyasha in ANY way shape or form they are not of my creation and therefor do not take credit, what I do take credit for is the creation of Nai and this story line)

Please this is my first fic so be gentle with me I would appreciate reviews , but please no flames

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(Intro)

The day you saw me...

The day you saw me I was alone, lost and helpless like the silly little girl I was, you tasted my innocense in the wind and you felt my cries, you soaked in my despair.

The day your eyes gazed upon my mine I no longer felt fear, I was beyond that now...I felt so alone, I felt my heart beat , like an animal chased into a corner, I no longer was able to think clearly. The only thoughts in my head was "why did I follow that girl...was it to return the pretty piece of glass she dropped or curiosity it couldn't tell.

The day you chased after me I knew the hunt was on, my legs aching as I bound from roots. As branches whipped my face , I touched it lightly feeling the welts develop, I winced in pain as my shoe caught a tree root and I came crashing down.

The day you caught me, I prayed for my life and shut my eyes waiting...for the darkness to take me...were you that darkness?

The day you touched me lightly, gently picking me up from the ground I was sprawled upon. I saw into your eyes, I saw the soul of a creature more tormented then myself. In synthetic bravery brought to me by my will to die I grabbed him, tearing the baboon mask from his face waiting to die, hope it would come.

The day you watched a mortal become so much more,... red tinged my eyes as fear took over, the pink glass ..the piece of the shikon no tama resonating in my grasp, my breath forced and panicking I shouted out to the gods to save me...my prayers were answered.

The day you saw me...you watched a mortal become a god, you heard my prayers go answered, but you felt me more tortured then ever. I wished for death, but instead I was granted eternal life.

That very day that same day you desired me, wanting me, but yet powerful as you are now I smelled your fear lightly drift in the air...you knew you had to earn me, to win me.

That day you saw a spirit with power, power that could be yours to control.

The day I fell threw the well way the day I died...the day I was reincarnated.

That day I saw you smile and as powerful as I was I felt afraid, knowing not power but just mortal bounds, I whimpered lightly as my power drained, I was changing back into a mortal form without knowing I became divine in the first place, his grasp on me loosened as I felt him place me down softly upon the green moss below me in the deep green forest I felt sleep grip me and all I could do was dream of how I got hear.

The day you saw me...my life changed.

The day you saw me I died.

The day you saw me...I was cursed.

The day you saw me you knew I was yours.

But...the day you saw me, so did someone else...

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this is only an intro there will be more, suggestions welcome but please no flames, constructive criticize only, thank you, please R&R 


	2. What is it like to die?

Ok the Intro was a success therefore I'm gonna update, please keep sending in the good reviews

The day you saw me...

What does it mean to die?

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Even though I slept soundly, my thoughts carried me to the present, sitting in my room with the knife in my hand...watching as my own blood flowed, staining my uniform and dripping down to the floor. 

I wiped the tears from my face, covering myself with blood...it wasn't the pain that hurt, it was the reasons why I did this that did. I hated myself, the strange outcast that I was . No one in that god forsaken place knew me, what right did they have to judge me? I sighed deeply knowing that this was what life was like. It wasn't my fault I wasn't born Japanese, it wasn't my fault that I was adopted...or was it? Either way after tonight it wouldn't matter. I had made up my mind that it must be done. I had no friends, my parents were so mad at me that they yelled at me telling me I was adopted, even though I knew I was adopted. I was a western girl, raised in Japan since I was six months old, abandoned by my true parents. Those ignorant bastards, I hope they pay.

I couldn't control it any longer, I sobbed loudly.

I stopped crying as I heard my doorbell ring. Slowly, looked out my window. It was a girl from my school. Kagome I think it was. I quickly wrapped up my arm, wondering what she wanted.

I made my way to the door and opened it, there she stood, with a smile.

"Hello!" she said to me cheerfully,

"Uh...Hi..."I started, wondering what the hell one of 'Them' wanted.

"I just came to see how you were doing, I thought you looked lonely so I decided to introduce myself to you, and don't worry about the other girls, they're just jealous because they're not as unique as you are."

I blinked a few times wondering what sort of drugs this girl was on. No one, and I mean no one, should be that happy.

"Uh sure..."

"Well aren't you going to invite me in?" she smiled more as she entered my house.

"Um...yeah come in...I guess" my hand clutched my wrist, the one with the fresh cut in it. I checked to see if the blood would soak through the bandages. I nervously looked down at the blood splotches on my shirt, she then noticed them too.

"What happened to you? Are you ok?" she looked worried. No one worries for me so why should this girl?

"Uh...yeah...I just cut myself a little, it was just an accident, I'm fine though." I was getting more irritated, all I wanted was for her to leave. There were things I still needed to take care of, like sending myself into the Abyss.

"Look...I have homework I need to do."

"Oh that's ok so do I, we can do it together," she piped up cheerfully.

I shook my head slightly, this girl cant take a hint. "And...my parents are going to be home soon, unfortunately I'm not allowed to have people over."

A hurt look came over Kagome's eyes "Oh well then...maybe tomorrow we can hang out! Go shopping perhaps? Come on it will be fun!" her eyes seemed to light up, I knew she wouldn't take no for an answer, hell it might even be 'FUN'. I sighed slightly and nodded to her in defeat. "O.K. sure then, 4pm fine?"

She smiled as she walked through the door, "4pm it is...meet me at my house, it's at the local shrine!"

I sighed and shut the door, a pink piece of crystal caught my attention, it looked somewhat valuable "It must be Kagome's...I'll give it to her tomorrow when I meet her." I bent down to pick it up, as my skin touched the shard I gasped, it felt as if something shot right through me. Shaking my head I grasped it, the feeling dissipating as fast as it came. I slowly walked up the stairs, a feeling of nausea coming over me with each step I took. I felt dizzy and my vision started to blur. I looked down at my wrist and saw it streaming; blood. My eyes trailed down the carpet and saw a line of blood reaching down the stairs.

"No...I cant die now...NO! I wont die...not yet..." I lightly fell as I reached the top stair, my fingers feeling the smooth yet jagged texture of the crystal piece.

As my eyes closed I thought I saw the shard glow a dull pink...it might have been my imagination, a final thought made by a dying girl.

I awoke in the shadowy softness of dawn. I immediately threw the covers off in a panic, grabbing my wrist in fear...nothing...not even a scar. But in my hand I held the pink shard.

I still felt a slight dizziness come over me but for the most part the sickness was gone. I walked down the hall toward the stairs. Not a trace of blood showed. I entered the kitchen and looked around, I noticed a note on the table:

Nai

The dishes need to be done, I'll be home after work. Oh and Kagome called.

Love Mom.

I smiled slightly wondering what happened last night, it was as if my attempt at suicide never happened. I knew I slit my wrist before Kagome came...I felt myself dying when she left. I saw myself bleed...the eternal sleep washing over me. But here I was alive and well and my mother acted as if nothing happened. Maybe I was hallucinating, having an acid flash-back. I regretted doing drugs at the Tokyo raves, but what's done is done.

"GOD I'M SO SCREWED UP!" I yelled at the ceiling. I gasped as I doubled over in pain, I felt a sharp pain in my wrist, I looked down and all I saw was the crystal shard still in my hand.

"Wh-what's wrong with me?" I started to cry softly. Fear building up in me, a fear of life, a fear of death. I no longer knew what was real, if anything was truly real.

I looked at the clock, I decided I should just shower and get ready, besides it was already 1:30 pm. I went up stairs and placed the piece of crystal in the pocket of the clothes I would be wearing that day.

I turned on the shower and stripping out of my clothing I looked at myself in the mirror, my dyed, blood-red hair reaching my thin waist. My green eyes, almost cat like in shape, shed no light of happiness. My skin was so pale it could be compared with snow, people hated me because I was gothic? Or because I wasn't Japanese? Or maybe because I was just different. No one knew me, what right did they have to judge me? Besides I never looked that weird at school, I didn't wear make-up there and I always wore my uniform. I tried to fit in but I guess my attitude and they way I thought wasn't good enough for them. Maybe because I refused to conform.

I stepped into the shower feeling the warm water wash away my worries, my pain, my misery, for once I felt at peace.

I shut my eyes soaking in the ambient noises, the running water , my own breathing, it felt as though time slowed just for me, but if any thing it sped up.

I sighed deeply getting out of the shower and turning it off. I felt so confused and I just wanted to know what was wrong with me. I dried myself off while getting dressed in a pair of black pants that were ripped at the knees and I slipped into a dark purple shirt that cut off at the shoulders. I went down stairs put on a pair of boots and walked out the door.

As I exited my house and walked down the street everything seemed different, it was as if I was seeing the world in grey. I mean, it still had colour, but it was a dulled colour, it wasn't as bright and vivid as I remembered it. The colours were off and it felt that I was inn a world apart from this one, everything seemed slower. I came up to the Local temple and I saw her, Kogome, and a boy in a red kimono running into a small shed-like building.

I ran after them calling out to Kagome, I felt a pain in my leg. From my pocket I pulled out the jewel shard, it began to glow again and my wrist began to bleed.

"Oh GOD!...not again!" I started to panic, the blood pouring down like a river, the dizzy and sick feeling returning. I slowed down trying to calm down, covering my slashed wrist in a petty attempt to stop the bleeding. By then Kogome and the white haired boy disappeared, my only mistake was in following them.

I entered the small building and saw a well, I slowly made my way over to it and carefully peered inside...Nothing. I turned to leave my vision blurring and my breath grew short I struggled to breathe. My head fell low with defeat, I was tired., oh so tired. I wanted to sleep.

I stumbled over myself and fell backwards into the well. I had no energy left to scream so I shut my eyes, but the only pain I felt was the pain my hand, I looked at it and saw the Shard sinking into my skin, being absorbed.

I smiled slightly as a feeling of energy passing threw me took over, I was covered in a blue aura.

"So...this is death." I sighed to myself as I kept falling, the sleep took over.

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This concludes chapter 2 hope you liked it please R&R. Another Good job by my editor Mr. BunnyButtons 


	3. Oh Tenyo Divine and the Corrupt Hagoromo

Chapter 3...finally it took me long enough but I'm now well enough to start, and a very BIG sorry for the delay, I hope you enjoy.

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Chapter 3: Oh Tenyo Divine and the Corrupt Hagoromo

I finally came back to reality , the world was hazy...I expected to see the busy streets I remembered, not a thick forest. I could barely remember what had happened to me, then I remembered committing suicide and my wounds re-opening at the shrine. I also remembered being held by the man in the white baboon skins and struggling, ripping away his mask and seeing the person for whom he was. They say that eyes are the window to ones soul...then he must have a soul so deranged, dark and disturbed that it puts me and my morbid thoughts to shame, what he sought to do to humanity was much...much more unsettling to me.

I tried to push myself up, but winced in pain as I fell back to the ground. The centre of my hand burned, but the pain died as quickly as I realized it was there. I looked at my hand and saw the pink shard stillsinking into my hand then finally disappearing. I shook my head slightly, with the haziness gone I looked around the forest and saw a well in a clearing, a well just like the one a the local shrine.

"Where am I?" I murmured to myself.

I tried to stand again, this time with success. I looked around myself there was nothing but forests and that small clearing. I felt this urge to just start walking, not in any particular direction though, it was like something was calling me, and I had no choice but to answer.

I walked on for what seemed like minutes but with each step I took my body felt like I've been going for hours. The rips in my pants were allowing thorny branches to catch my bare skin, I was to busy following the voices in my head to notice. I laughed silently to myself as I thought about following unknown voices, and thinking I'm dead. But now I'm starting to think I'm crazy.

I smiled to myself as a branch caught my face and I felt the warn bloodseep from my cheek. I touched it lightly with my fingers, tracing along the cut to determine the length...it was only a few centimetres long...nothing to worry about. I finally came to a small clearing with a pond in the centre, and in the middle of that was a statue of a nearly naked woman. She held an elegant pose with her face down looking into the clear water, she had a sad expression and around her body she was wrapped in a thin, transparent black cloth.

I slowly approached the edge of the pond, this was were the voice led me to, I was positive. I breathed in deeply as a cool wind blew past. Somehow I felt renewed here, like a great burden was lifted. All the pain I had from the walk was dissipating, and my cuts and scratches no longer hurt, I touched the scratch on my face and found my skin smooth as if it had never been maimed.

I looked around nervously, I had this feeling like I was being watched.

I knelt down to look into the pond and I saw the statues reflection, I thought I saw her eyes move to look at me, but I couldn't be sure. I looked at the expression on her face, I was so sad and I couldn't help but wonder if this were once a real person. Her reflection looked deep into the water as if she saw into the unknown. Something then caught my eye, I reached down into the clear water and pulled out from the muddy bottom, a gold chain with a black pearl hanging from it. As I looked at it I saw something else, I saw the statue smile. I looked up from the water to see the statues face, not looking down into the water but looking down at me. I began to hear the voices again, but this time they were coming out as words..."Naraku loved."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I felt like I was talking to myself.

"The mark of the spider, Tenyo!"

"Tenyo?...Spider?...What the hell are you talking about?" I was becoming more confused each word she spoke.

"I see past, present and future, I the great Tenyo...Celestial Maiden Huragashin was trapped here by the fool Onigumo, better know as Naraku." Her stone image was looking straight at me, the look of anger, rage and hatred. I felt as if I saw raw emotion.

"You hold the mark of that demon! Ha...demon...he's just a half-breed, but I see it now with your presence, I see my salvation and your corruption." she sneered at me, I felt myself grow weak and I felt like I was going to be sick.

"Tenyo, with your death you were reborn to fulfill a destiny, your path is clear, as is mine. I know I will never return to the heavens, but with your evolution I will be free! I will be reborn and live a mortal life, and when I die I will be brought back into the cycle. No...there will never be rest for me, but as long as I have my freedom it wont matter!"

I felt myself clutching the chain, it was hair thin and looked delicate but it wouldn't break, I was frozen and could do nothing but watch and listen.

"60 years ago Onigumo stole my precious Hagoromo; the fabled feathered robe. He was such an evil man that he tainted my purity through that of the Hagoromo, turning it's white silk black with his evil. I made him pay, but my actions just turned him into the monstrosity he is today. I cursed him with blood and fire and I made him suffer the way he made me suffer! I burned his body with the flame of my rage. But in the end my sorrow, and the hate that turned my heart to stone also turned my body into stone. I am no more than a living statue, only able to watch all of time, as I'm punished for my evil." I slowly stood up as if someone else controlled my body, I put the black pearl necklace on and reached out towards the statue.

"All that's left for you, my dear Tenyo, is to pass on the sacred Hagoromo. I will let go of my anger now that I'm free, and possibly even forgive the world of it's evil. But know this, Tenyo, the power you will gain can either control or be controlled. Your future I can not see, whether it's the path of corruption or salvation is determined whom is stronger. The evil that's been feeding the Hagoromo, or the light that exists in your dark soul. In time you will learn to unlock your power, and the black pearl is the key to your future. Farewell Tenyo, may your Naraku's wickedness die and your soul be at peace."

The statue closed her eyes and look of peace over came her as I pulled away the black silk from her body. The statue crumbled before me becoming dust and blowing away in the breeze.

I began to choke as I could no longer breathe, the thin chain felt heavy against my neck. I tried to scream but all that came was silence, the world began to fade into nothing and the colours began to melt into darkness. The Hagoromo began to wrap around my body as if it were alive and I felt it's vile power immerse itself within me. I cried out silently as tears ran down my face, I felt what it was like to truly hate something, to hate ones self, to hate existence. I learned that my death wish was petty selfishness brought on by my want for attention. But this was the will of the Hagoromo. I had to fight for control, but I was weak and it was fed by 60 years of Naraku's hatred towards life, and I, according to Huragashin was marked by him. Never in my life had I felt so desolate, I felt so...empty. It no longer mattered to me if I was an empty shell, I stoped trying to scream and just stood still. The less I struggled, the less it hurt. All I wanted now was to drown in my darkness and revel in the anguish that surrounded me. One thing now plagued my mind; that I must find Naraku and end his life. I knew now who he was, he was the man in the baboon pelt, the man that looked at me with lust in his eyes. A malevolent smile came to my face as I walked from clearing, I knew what I must do.

I walked with otherworldly grace, the Hagoromo floated around my body as I went on my way. Everything felt different to me, I felt powerful, I felt the Godly energy flowing through my veins. I was intoxicated by it, I craved more and I knew I had to go through Naraku to get it. I stopped suddenly and looked at my hand, the hand that the jewel shard sunk into, I saw a small area the shape of the shard turn black and my power intensified. I smiled at first then the smile became laughter, I laughed wickedly as I walked, for the time I was unstoppable. I was a God...and I knew it.

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WOOT! Chapter 3 is up and done, thank you so much for the support of everyone, especially Mr. BunnyButtons my editor(soon to have stories of his own on FictionPress under Vercengitorix) and yet again another sorry for the delay, I've had time to think on this chapter and I would love input, your likes/dislikes and generally some idea's. Please tell others to Read and review, also check out my other story- Teach me to fly! Thanks! . 


	4. Sorry For not posting

Very...Very Big Apology, if it weren't for the fact that I cant use the computer for long we'd all have another happy chapter of (Teach me to fly) AND the (day you saw me) but as this is no longer the case I will not be able to put up another chapter until my b/f gets a writing program on his computer...cries I would like more than anything to do another chapter, the words are just swimming in my head, but for me times are pretty rough with paying bills (don't it suck when your parents kick you out ) so like I said, I'm looking for a writing program for my b/fs computer...the day that happens will be the day a new chapter will be up again...another big sorry


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